Homeschooling Young Children – Accepting Messes

Have you ever met someone who instantly liked? I certainly have. How about a character in a book? Or what about a picture book? One of my kids read The Seven Silly Eaters by Mary Ann Hoberman aloud to me for his reading time, and I instantly loved the mom, Mrs. Peters. The book is about a family with seven kids who all insist on eating one particular food all the time, and it must be homemade. The book doesn’t say whether the family homeschools, but they sure look like homeschoolers to me – messy house, seven kids, and they live out in the middle of nowhere. Whatever their schooling choice is, it reminded me of homeschooling young children and all the messes that it brings.

Accepting a Messy House

When I had my first baby, my house was always clean. Always. These days….ummm…I really try my best. We clean the house once a week – vacuum, dust, mop, organize misplaced things, but it still looks messy to some degree most of the time.  We also pick up at the end of the day, but by 8:30 am the next morning, it’s a mess again.

In the book The Seven Silly Eaters, the house is a mess on almost every single page. The only page where it isn’t a mess is when they have their first child. As more children are added to the family, the house gets messier. For some reason the messy house made me like the Peter’s family even more because you could tell that they lived there. There’s life in their small home with their seven children, and you can tell by all the toys that are on the floor, the mess from baking, and the piles of laundry.

Often times, I think my house shouldn’t be a mess. However, the reality is that a family that spends a large portion of the day at their house will inevitably have a messy, or lived-in, home. I’m not saying toss out the cleaning routines and begin living as a hoarder. What I am saying is that it’s good to relax a little bit when it comes to having a clean house, especially if you’re homeschooling young children.  Otherwise, I find it hard to enjoy my time with my children.

Some people don’t see messes, or the messes simply don’t bother them, so nothing really gets cleaned up. I am the opposite. I see every mess. There’s something inside of me that compels me to clean it up. In fact, it seems wrong to not clean up a mess. That leads me to my next point. 

Relaxing in The Mess

In the beginning of the book, Mrs. Peters is playing her cello, something she clearly enjoys doing. Later on, Mrs. Peters is playing her cello right beside a basket of laundry. If I had to take a lesson from Mrs. Peters, it’s to do something enjoyable even if the area around me is messy and slightly chaotic.  I have to discipline myself to leave the mess alone and do something like read a book or write for a few minutes. Otherwise, I never get around to doing to reading because I am tried by the end of the day. 

Moms do a lot for their kids – working moms and moms homeschooling young children. I said earlier that it seems wrong to leave a mess alone. I would also argue that it seems wrong to never do anything that is relaxing. Moms need a break too. Playing the cello is how Mrs. Peter’s relaxes, and she does it with all her kids around her. 

I used to think I can only relax when it’s quiet and peaceful, but I have learned how to relax for a few minutes in a messy home with my kids all around me. Relaxing doesn’t always mean lying down. I find it relaxing to be out in my garden with my kids. Also, I can read a book and write with my kids around (there are quite a few interruptions though). It’s relaxing to take a walk with my kids. I hope I am making sense. You can find moments to recharge (in whatever way you like) even if you have a lot of kids right next to you.  Of course, peace and quiet is also nice.

I think moms who are introverted like me have to be aware of their limitations. I get tired if people talk to me all day long. And guess what little kids do? They talk all day long! Sometimes it’s the same conversation over and over again. Over the years I have gotten a lot better at being patient with the constant chatter. It doesn’t wear me out so much now. 

My mother-in-law watches my kids often. Sometimes she takes them for a walk, and when I come back home, the house is filled with daylight, empty, and quiet (I am used to the quiet at night). I enjoy it for a while, but at the same time, it also doesn’t feel natural. Don’t worry. My kids come tumbling in soon enough. 

And Mrs. Peters….

The book ends with the family finding a recipe that works for everyone. That must have been a relief to Mrs. Peters!. I really like one of the last pictures. Everyone is making the cake, and there’s Mrs. Peters,, relaxing and playing her cello with her favorite people all around her. You can tell that she’s a happy mom. I think that’s why I like her: She’s got a lot of kids, her house is a mess, and she’s happy.

So, whether you have a lot of kids, or are homeschooling young children, enjoy the mess because years from now your house will be very clean….so hard to imagine. You might find yourself missing the messes. Speaking of messes, I have three laundry baskets waiting for me, a book to read aloud to my kids, and markers all over the floor (with the caps on). Off I go!

Carly from DesertHomeschoolDays.com